#13, #14, and Reinforcements

House Showing #13 was on Tuesday. It was the usual frenzy of cleaning, herding cats, loading dogs, and so on.

I jumped in my van with all the dogs, who were certain that this time we really were going somewhere SO FUN — and was stopped on my driveway by a turtle 🐢

I have never seen a giant turtle at my house before but there he was — right in the driveway. I had to get out, assess whether said turtle was a snapping turtle, and then safely herd the turtle off the driveway. I wish I had taken a photo but I was so frantic to be gone that I only thought of that later.

I have decided the turtle was a messenger — house selling might be slow.

But the lupines were quite pretty during Showing #13.

And the dogs remained optimistic that something amazing was going to happen.

It didn’t but that was okay.

It was nice to have a two day break from showings — but we were back at it today for Showing #14.

This time I was ready with my reinforcements.

I read up on the correct way to utilize St. Joseph to sell a house — there are entire websites with instructions! The gist of it is that you wrap St. Joseph in a cloth, put him in a plastic bag, and bury him upside down and facing the house while you say a prayer.

One website noted this about the prayer part of all that: “Some prayers “threaten” St. Joseph, essentially stating that he should sell your home for you if he wants to get out of the ground. These prayers somewhat undermine the value of asking for intercession, however, so they are generally not preferred” (wikiHow).

There is so much wrong with threatening a small plastic statue with permanent burial 😂😂😂

It turns out that once you sell the house, you dig up St. Joseph, dust him off, and then give him a place of honor in your new house. This temporary burial strategy changed things for me. Since I would be recovering everything in the plastic bag, I decided to give St. Joseph some help.

St. Joseph went into the Lucky Sock and that went in the bag, along with the Lucky Happy Hippie Heart.

Sparkle, of course!

We took all that to the hole we dug.

The various instructions mentioned burial next to the for sale sign and so that is what we did 🤷🏼‍♀️

With St. Joseph safely buried upside down, we turned our attention to the House Selling Gnome. The guidelines on how exactly to utilize the gnome were a little vague, and so I improvised.

I placed him in a discreet, wooded location befitting a gnome — but facing the driveway to be able to see the buyers as they arrived.

And I added this to the bottom of his boot…

Yes, there is dog hair taped to the note — that seems appropriate.

Frantic cleaning, cat herding, dog loading and it was time for the long, slow drive to no where while Showing #14 was happening.

Sparkle continues to enjoy the thrill of the forbidden front seat.

The lupines are definitely fading.

And the baby deer made an appearance!

She looks big in the pic but is actually SO tiny

But nobody met me on the road with a shotgun demanding to know why I keep driving slowly by their house.

#win 🏆

Happy Friday, Friends.

I Need a Vacation!

Yesterday was a busy day.

Siding Dude made the dog door holes (n=2) disappear.

I weeded my giant garden 😂

I also weeded the flower beds, watered all over the place, and figured out how to start the weed whacker — Go Me. I weed whacked until my arms felt like jello. That is a good workout 💪🏼

I used the new chain saw to cut up some branches — without slicing into a major artery — and I even repotted a cute and decorative plant I bought for one of the bathrooms.

Unfortunately, I forgot to close the bathroom door and so Rosebud ate some of said plant (see above for gnawed leaves) — and threw up on the floor. That really sums up how things go around here.

I also worked on door painting.

And got buzzed by the hummingbirds.

I was up early today to continue getting ready for the Open House. Here is a photo of Sparkle whispering to Claire in the middle of all that:

Sparkle: “Psst. Claire. Mom is a psycho.”

Claire: “I know.”

never.ever.selling.a.house.again.

But the house got cleaned, the cats were successfully herded, and the dogs loaded up without any major mishaps — and so off we went to kill 3+ hours.

First stop was a field to do some walks — this is Sparkle and Claire.

Then we went to the feed store and got bones for the dogs in the back of the van to chew — Sparkle did not get one as there is not enough room in the passenger seat for chewing (or anything else).

We drove very slowly to the bird sanctuary that is near the house and then drove very slowly through said bird sanctuary.

Nobody minded the extra slow driving because that is what you do at a bird sanctuary — perfect!

Then we drove our usual back road route. We saw our friend, Mom Deer.

Baby Deer was snoozing a bit away from her.

We checked out the lupine — I think it is starting to fade a bit.

I brought my real camera today just to take this photo.

I have driven on that road so many times and it is also one of my favorite bike rides — and yet I never noticed that old truck sitting in the field until Showing #9 the other night.

Clearly it has been there all along — I just never noticed.

And that got me wondering — what else is right in front of me that I am not seeing?! 🤯

My co-pilot got sleepy and somehow managed to squeeze into napping position 🤷🏼‍♀️💤

And then 3+ hours was done and we got to go home and add three more showings to our total!

I have decided it is time to bring in some extra help in this house selling adventure.

Apparently, you bury St. Joseph and somehow he helps you sell your house even though he is buried in dirt (and made of plastic).

I wonder if they have St. Joseph Lucky Socks?! Now THAT sounds like a winner.

Happy Saturday ❤️

Let's Finish This Job

We are up to nine showings.

The lupine continues to be stunning.

And yes, I always think of Wildflower Lupine, the cute girl dog, when I drive by that field.

My co-pilot continues to wonder what the heck we are doing on these slow drives to no where.

I did not find a recent offer acceptable and so that did not pan out.

I have spent over $100k remodeling and updating the house with selling in mind — and that does not include hundreds and hundreds of hours that my family and I spent cleaning out a hoarder before the work could be done. I have done all the painting and many other tasks that have been part of this project. This house has been my part-time job for over two years.

I wanted the house to be nice for the new owners and I am proud of what we all — me, Remodel Dude, Mover Dudes, family, friends — have accomplished.

But this is not my space anymore. Not my place. I am living here in the next person’s home until they show up and I can move on.

When I started getting the house ready to sell last fall, I was clear with the realtor that I wanted to maximize the odds of a quick sale. I remodeled to make the house more appealing, and that has been successful — we receive many compliments on the house from people who see it.

I have packed up as much personal stuff as possible. The house is neutral and ready for the dreams of someone else, and that makes it kind of sad to live here.

I want my big ass ribbons back on the walls. I want family photos where I can see them. I need messy area rugs all over for Harper B for Been Slipping and Sliding again.

I want a home of my own.

And so even though it has been only 15 days and we have had GREAT Zillow stats and interest, we have lowered the price of the house and have an open house planned for tomorrow 🍀

And that means serious cleaning and yard work today and tomorrow until 10:45 am when the dogs and I will clear out to drive slowly by the lupines again.

And again.

And again.

You can see a lot of lupines in three hours!

Happy Friday to you, Friend ❤️