Waiting for #18

When I started this house showing stuff, I read that — on average — a house is shown between 10 and 25 times before it sells. I settled on a middle number and decided my house had to be shown 18 times before it would sell.

We are at 17.

Showing the house is my new part-time gig. I calculated that each showing represents about five hours of my time. There is the frenzy of cleaning, cat herding, dog loading, and aimless wandering on the dirt roads.

The company is pleasant. I usually chat with my daughter or sister for at least part of the wandering, and I always have a happy co-pilot.

Sparkle

I text lupine photos to Alison — and they are really faded now so I will have to find something else she might appreciate.

And because I am driving so slowly, I notice things that I have not really seen before. Like this strange and random thing at a corner.

Once the dogs and I are in the car I breathe a sigh of relief — everything leading up to that point is so stressful. But once we are driving, I can relax.

And then the realtor calls to tell me that the coast is clear and we head home to undo the loading, cat herding, and cleaning.

Until next time.

17 showings x 5 hours per showing = 85 hours.

The house has been on the market for four weeks.

I am spending about 21 hours per week on showings, and that doesn’t include the ongoing cleaning and yard work.

This is a lot. I hope the new owners show up soon!

In addition to my part-time gig as a Hopeful House Seller/Dirt Road Wanderer, I am teaching summer school — online, thankfully — and so I find myself once again training my dogs in micro sessions because time is so limited (and it has gotten SO hot!).

Harper B is the world’s slowest eater and has to be reminded several times during breakfast to keep eating.

Harper B for Being 12 and 3/4 years old!

Pozy and Capella are in the breakfast shift with Harper and are done super fast — and so I got the bright idea to use that time to teach them out of sight stays.

Pozy and Capella doing stays on the not new deck

It has worked beautifully! They stay while I go to talk with Harper B for Better Eat, and then I return to Capella and Pozy and reward/remind them to keep staying — and repeat.

The time spent waiting — for a dog to eat or a house to sell or a heart to heal — can have meaning and value.

Time is precious — it is never waste.

And so as I wait to sell my house, I am reminded of my favorite Mary Oliver quote:

Tell me, what is it you plan to do

With your one wild and precious life?

Because waiting is actually part of our one wild and precious life, and so I want to use it wisely and with intention.

Happy Saturday, Friend ❤️

#13, #14, and Reinforcements

House Showing #13 was on Tuesday. It was the usual frenzy of cleaning, herding cats, loading dogs, and so on.

I jumped in my van with all the dogs, who were certain that this time we really were going somewhere SO FUN — and was stopped on my driveway by a turtle 🐢

I have never seen a giant turtle at my house before but there he was — right in the driveway. I had to get out, assess whether said turtle was a snapping turtle, and then safely herd the turtle off the driveway. I wish I had taken a photo but I was so frantic to be gone that I only thought of that later.

I have decided the turtle was a messenger — house selling might be slow.

But the lupines were quite pretty during Showing #13.

And the dogs remained optimistic that something amazing was going to happen.

It didn’t but that was okay.

It was nice to have a two day break from showings — but we were back at it today for Showing #14.

This time I was ready with my reinforcements.

I read up on the correct way to utilize St. Joseph to sell a house — there are entire websites with instructions! The gist of it is that you wrap St. Joseph in a cloth, put him in a plastic bag, and bury him upside down and facing the house while you say a prayer.

One website noted this about the prayer part of all that: “Some prayers “threaten” St. Joseph, essentially stating that he should sell your home for you if he wants to get out of the ground. These prayers somewhat undermine the value of asking for intercession, however, so they are generally not preferred” (wikiHow).

There is so much wrong with threatening a small plastic statue with permanent burial 😂😂😂

It turns out that once you sell the house, you dig up St. Joseph, dust him off, and then give him a place of honor in your new house. This temporary burial strategy changed things for me. Since I would be recovering everything in the plastic bag, I decided to give St. Joseph some help.

St. Joseph went into the Lucky Sock and that went in the bag, along with the Lucky Happy Hippie Heart.

Sparkle, of course!

We took all that to the hole we dug.

The various instructions mentioned burial next to the for sale sign and so that is what we did 🤷🏼‍♀️

With St. Joseph safely buried upside down, we turned our attention to the House Selling Gnome. The guidelines on how exactly to utilize the gnome were a little vague, and so I improvised.

I placed him in a discreet, wooded location befitting a gnome — but facing the driveway to be able to see the buyers as they arrived.

And I added this to the bottom of his boot…

Yes, there is dog hair taped to the note — that seems appropriate.

Frantic cleaning, cat herding, dog loading and it was time for the long, slow drive to no where while Showing #14 was happening.

Sparkle continues to enjoy the thrill of the forbidden front seat.

The lupines are definitely fading.

And the baby deer made an appearance!

She looks big in the pic but is actually SO tiny

But nobody met me on the road with a shotgun demanding to know why I keep driving slowly by their house.

#win 🏆

Happy Friday, Friends.

I Need a Vacation!

Yesterday was a busy day.

Siding Dude made the dog door holes (n=2) disappear.

I weeded my giant garden 😂

I also weeded the flower beds, watered all over the place, and figured out how to start the weed whacker — Go Me. I weed whacked until my arms felt like jello. That is a good workout 💪🏼

I used the new chain saw to cut up some branches — without slicing into a major artery — and I even repotted a cute and decorative plant I bought for one of the bathrooms.

Unfortunately, I forgot to close the bathroom door and so Rosebud ate some of said plant (see above for gnawed leaves) — and threw up on the floor. That really sums up how things go around here.

I also worked on door painting.

And got buzzed by the hummingbirds.

I was up early today to continue getting ready for the Open House. Here is a photo of Sparkle whispering to Claire in the middle of all that:

Sparkle: “Psst. Claire. Mom is a psycho.”

Claire: “I know.”

never.ever.selling.a.house.again.

But the house got cleaned, the cats were successfully herded, and the dogs loaded up without any major mishaps — and so off we went to kill 3+ hours.

First stop was a field to do some walks — this is Sparkle and Claire.

Then we went to the feed store and got bones for the dogs in the back of the van to chew — Sparkle did not get one as there is not enough room in the passenger seat for chewing (or anything else).

We drove very slowly to the bird sanctuary that is near the house and then drove very slowly through said bird sanctuary.

Nobody minded the extra slow driving because that is what you do at a bird sanctuary — perfect!

Then we drove our usual back road route. We saw our friend, Mom Deer.

Baby Deer was snoozing a bit away from her.

We checked out the lupine — I think it is starting to fade a bit.

I brought my real camera today just to take this photo.

I have driven on that road so many times and it is also one of my favorite bike rides — and yet I never noticed that old truck sitting in the field until Showing #9 the other night.

Clearly it has been there all along — I just never noticed.

And that got me wondering — what else is right in front of me that I am not seeing?! 🤯

My co-pilot got sleepy and somehow managed to squeeze into napping position 🤷🏼‍♀️💤

And then 3+ hours was done and we got to go home and add three more showings to our total!

I have decided it is time to bring in some extra help in this house selling adventure.

Apparently, you bury St. Joseph and somehow he helps you sell your house even though he is buried in dirt (and made of plastic).

I wonder if they have St. Joseph Lucky Socks?! Now THAT sounds like a winner.

Happy Saturday ❤️