I am on what I am sure is a lifelong quest to better understand myself — and just Life, with and without Dogs.
Do you ever think of yourself as a Single-subject research project?
Probably not.
I do.
One of my recent observations is random bad things quickly get translated into my “inconvenience” category rather than spinning me into the depths of despair. I recognize that not everyone is like this and I find that interesting.
Two woody near-tragic things? Meh. Good stories. (Once I stop shaking).
Where I become obsessive and intense is in an area that most people seem willing to just move on by. I am not sure what to call that area or feature of life — injustice?
But it is not just injustice — it is a specific area of injustice that makes me bristle.
Hmmmm.
In thinking of situations that send me off to obsessively hunt and stalk like a quiet lion after prey, I realize the commonality is this: Taking advantage because of a morally bankrupt character and/or position. In such circumstances, I simply won’t back down.
Why, I wonder, am I like this?
On the positive side, I have learned to line up the dots and make sure I am correct before moving in for the take down.
Further, experience and maturity (!) has taught me to use only the amount of pressure that will generate desired change. No need to announce the name of the Cheater, for example, if more subtle pressure will work.
But yes, I do wonder why I walk through the world like this, triggered by things that cause others to shrug with resignation.
“Speak softly and carry a big stick.” (Theodore Roosevelt)
Interesting.
Maybe this is a kind of important diversity?
I don’t know.
What I do know is that this is just an aspect of who and what I am, and I am okay with that because I also know that I am loyal, fair, and quick to extend Grace — because in the end, we are all only human.
Except dogs — they are not human. They are so many other and better things.
I love research. Even — or maybe especially — when the subject is me.