My beloved, happy girl could not stay.
Her brave, strong, loving heart stopped beating last night.
Claire had a cardiac arrest following surgery for a bowel torsion. The surgery went very well but it was all too much for her heart.
Claire was the happiest, most joyful dog I have ever known. She LOVED her life. In fact, I think her motto was Life, Love, Bark.
The last three year have been filled with heartbreak, loss, betrayal, and disillusionment. Through it, Claire was a beacon of joy. A constant bright light in a very dark time. An invitation to find hopes and dreams again.
And we did.
The pandemic and then — I am not sure what to call those years of sickening enlightenment — were the context of Claire’s adult life, and it impacted what we could do together. I am tempted to tell you how much more she could have done — should have done — but the truth is, Claire did her job. Her job was me.
The last picture of Claire at home — with Sparkle
In the middle of the night I went to say good-bye to my beloved girl. I told her so many things. How much I love her. How much we will miss her. How I knew she did not want to leave me. How sorry I was that we could not have another comeback.
By the end, I just found myself thanking her. Over and over and over. It turns out that love and gratitude don’t leak out of a shattered heart.